As expected, there is a certain level of stress that comes with feeling like you have to do the deed on prescribed days and times. While we both know there are certain things that need to happen in order to conceive, the timing has just been … off. For the past two months I've either been sick to my stomach, cranky, bloated and/or J has been exhausted, traveling or injured and we would both rather stick hot pokers into our eyes than force intimacy. It’s a mutual feeling of frustration because ideally we want to conceive child under sweet, loving circumstances and not just getting the job done. I know we are not alone in this struggle but it's annoying nonetheless.
So, August and September were duds and there is no one to blame but ourselves. On the bright side, I continue to lose weight (well, depending on the week!) and spend time at the gym. The diet is still the hardest part and I have not been as faithful to the right foods as I should be. Prime example: J having to physically take away the biscuit I nibbled on at Cracker Barrel AFTER I defiantly ordered both the grits AND the hash brown casserole despite him alerting me to how many carbs I was ingesting at one sitting. I justified it to myself as a reward for biking for 45 minutes earlier that morning, but I know that doesn’t stop those delicious starches from becoming evil sugars. I would live on carbs if I had the chance – how sad is it they are my number one enemy? It makes me want to cry.
All that being said, we’ll see what October holds in store!
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